What are we teaching….

I have to rant a little, but I promise there’s a reason – a purpose behind it.

I’ve never understood why certain standards were set, particularly for young adults. (For this topic, I’m categorizing young adults as 16-26 years old.)

This idea of living a perfect life, even if a general set of standards is completely shattered.

I’m going to pull most of my examples from the religion I have the most experience with, but I’ve seen and heard about similar instances in other churches/organizations.

Why is it okay to teach young adults to live their life according to these x,y,z standards that align with religious view; when as soon as an individual makes a mistake – because hello they’re human- it all gets covered up?

Are we teaching young adults honesty, integrity, and dignity really do not matter? Are we teaching them that those x,y,z standards really have no meaning or weight because it can all be covered up with phony moral/religious acts?

If you aren’t quite following my thought process let me provide a run of the mill example. A young adult is taught from an early age that premarital sex is bad, frowned upon, unworthy, and looked down upon. Regardless, this individual fools around, maybe even commits this ‘act’. The parents don’t want to be seen as inadequate parents or even as failing at their most important job. They cover it up. The individual repents or makes amends and put the incident behind them; only to conveniently find and marry someone who actually upheld the x,y,z standards. The incident is never spoken of again and the individual gets to wear the badge of perfection, purity,  and be an advocate of x,y,z.  —- What exactly did they learn from that situation??

The same thing happens daily with clothing standards. How much skin is appropriate and how much is over the top?? Why is it okay to wear bikinis and booty shorts one week but then bermuda shorts and t-shirts the next?

I understand that as young adults get older and mature, standards naturally change. My issue isn’t with the process of growing up; it’s with the disconnect between the standards shown to the public and what is actually happening. I feel this is because young adults are expected to meet certain standards; but instead of being taught to own up to the mistake, make genuine amends, and move forward; they are taught to cover it up and slam on that charming Southern Belle smile.

Why in the world would we want our young adults to behave/operate/function in that manner? Is this setting them up for success later in life? Is it helping our communities become better, stronger, more close-knit?

I don’t think so…


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